When All the Walls Crumble, Just Look Up.

Looking back on my life, I've learned that life has ebbs, and it has flows. There are great days, and there are crap days. And then there are days that are just there, where time passes by before we know it. Each day, each hour, offers an opportunity -- but I've learned that you have to know where to look for it.

It's been almost two weeks since I've worked out becauser there is so much going on...it's one of those times where the tide is out, and I have a considerably higher amount of stress than normal. I have a lot going on in my life -- the joy and dedication to my awesome children, the emotionally draining process of a divorce, a demanding yet most enjoyable job, and yes, training and fundraising for this upcoming race. I am wondering if I can keep it all together.

I woke up today more stressed out than I have been in a while. My mind has been racing for the last few days -- logistics, bills, taxes, practice, fundraising (which I am way behind on, certainly due to the rough economic climate right now), work, a failed marraige, house chores...how could I make my mind stop racing? How can I make it through all this? So I opted to miss practice again this morning. Instead, I went to the one place (besides my childrens' smiles) that gives me my center -- church (God).

Today, pastor Dave Wilson (the pastor for the Detroit Lions) spoke. I always enjoy hearing him talk, he's a funny guy. He started out the service blaming himself for the Lions' 0-16 record this year. He was saying that besides saying prayers with the Lions before the games, he had also recently been asked to hold prayer for the school his son would soon go to, as well as his alma mater, Ball State...both times, they lost their games, so his conclusion was that it must be him. (Oh Dave how I wish it were that simple!)

Anyways, I always enjoy going to church, especially when my heart is beating unusually fast due to stress. I'm a pretty good poker player and often people don't know how stressed I can get, but I am human and sometimes I can't hide it. This morning was one of those times. I'm thankful that I know where to look to set me straight...I look up.

Service, once again, released a ton of stress for me, and I'm thankful. For me, it's like a massage for the soul. My kids enjoy service too, and I'm grateful for that as well. I'm feeling more centered now. I recognize that I need to make sure that I pay close attention to everything on my plate. This upcoming week will be one of the most challenging weeks that I've had in a very long time, and so all training must again go on the back burner.

I look foward to getting back on the saddle when I can squeek in a bit of free time to do so. I'm looking forward to the time that the tide changes, and things aren't so stressful. That time will come (just like knowing that there will be a time when Lions will someday win a game again). In the meantime, I'm glad I have something to fall back on when those walls feel like they are caving in around me. I have my family and their good health, my friends, my teammates, and oh yeah, the big guy upstairs. Thank God.

Have a great day, everyone. And don't forget to look up, it beat's looking down any day of the week.